Autistic Widower

The process did not seem as smooth as it could have been Photo taken by the author. Twice a week, my children do COVID-19 lateral flow tests. Afterwards, I report the results to the NHS via a government website, and also via their school’s online form. The process is not especially difficult, but it seems more time-consuming than necessary, and there is certainly room for improvement. This post describes the steps I go through, along with a few comments (shown in quotation style). Let me apologise in advance for such a long, boring post. (But it does reflect the nature of what I’m describing!) Before I begin, I should say that I think highly of the NHS in general. However, government IT systems are not always the best, and it’s the details of the reporting system that I’m criticising here. NHS COVID-19 Reporting I go to https://www.gov.uk/report-covid19-result . I click the “Start now” button and begin to answer the questions. Who are you reporting a result for? Someone else. Who was t...

Thinking about one of the conflicts that can occur, when both are involved According to the NHS website: One sign of ADHD is carelessness and lack of attention to detail. One sign of autism is noticing small details that others do not. Maybe it's just me, but there seems to be a bit of a conflict there. Or perhaps it explains the chaos I sometimes feel in my mind. Much of the work I used to do in electronic design and software development required good attention to detail. Self-praise isn't something that comes easily to me, but I think I did a pretty good job. So how did I manage to minimise careless mistakes? Did the autistic side of me take over, and zoom in on the details? Or did my 'ADHD hyperfocus' come to the rescue? Perhaps it was a combination of factors, including some techniques that I stumbled across over the years. Checking PCB Layouts When I was in my late teens, one of my jobs included checking printed circuit board (PCB) layouts, which someone had drawn ...

In the right circumstances, it can be quite effective The personal radio I used to use at work. Photo taken by the author. Recently, I've had to run a lot of errands, which has meant I've been driving quite a lot. I'd forgotten how much calmer I feel when driving for non-urgent purposes, especially if the radio is on and traffic is light. That made me think about how I used to listen to the radio at work, when I did electronic design and programming for about 20 years. I was lucky to have been employed by a small company, where the people didn't really mind. But there were times when I clashed with the boss about my choice of radio station, especially when we shared an office from time to time! When music was playing, it didn't usually interfere with what I was doing. (Some songs were impossible to ignore though!) When people were talking on the radio, sometimes I would listen to them. Perhaps that sounds unproductive, but it often served as a much-needed break from...

The time when I realised it’s more than autism alone Image created by the author. ADHD has been mentioned recently in some of the podcasts that I listen to, such as Roderick on the Line Episode 413 , from about 47 minutes in. (Warning: that podcast contains occasional profanity.) I have also read about ADHD on Twitter and elsewhere. It seems to me that ADHD could explain some of the difficulties I experience. If it weren’t for Coronavirus, I would probably seek an assessment. Hyperfocus is something that I have experienced. I get almost obsessed with doing one task for too long, to the exclusion of everything else. (It’s also why you don’t see me on Twitter for days or weeks — but I’m trying to become more aware of that.) When I worked full-time doing electronics and software development, I think hyperfocus helped me to perform well in my job — I couldn’t stop thinking (and talking) about the current technical problem or task, until I’d dealt with it. Now that I’m a stay-at-home dad, w...

Worrying about the risks of COVID-19 vs my children’s education Image created by the author. Next week, my children will return to school, as the UK begins the process of easing out of national lockdown. I am sure this will be good for their education, but I can’t help but feel a little bit uneasy about the risks. I am 52 years old, autistic and also a widowed parent. One of my children has type 1 diabetes, and I am effectively his carer. If I were to catch COVID-19, there is nobody else here to take care of my children. And there is no ex-partner who could help. However, my doctor says that I will not be given higher priority for the vaccine. So I will just have to hope that my children do not bring it home with them. After isolating for so long, I am now effectively being forced to take risks. I know a few people who are younger (who live with partners), who have already had the vaccine, because they have children who are autistic. (I believe one of my children may be autistic, but h...