I Have Moved to Medium and Substack

In 2022, I moved to Medium and Substack. 

Please consider following me there. 


🔗 Alan AJ on Medium 

(Formerly Autistic Widower.)


🔗 Soul to Scribe on Substack 


Last updated: 30 May 2024


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Why I Left the Autism Support Group

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It started off fairly well, but I had to leave in the end My “biscuit emoji” to represent how I felt towards the end. Photo taken by author. Late last year, I started attending a local support group for autistic adults. In a previous blog post , I wrote about my first few weeks there. Back then, I had high hopes — but things did not go very well in the end.  I wanted to share my closing experience, without putting you off trying a group in your local area — which has every chance of having a better outcome than what I experienced. The Beginning of the End At the start of the year, I had a series of ‘bad weeks’ at the group, which made me decide that it wasn’t for me. I stopped going some time around February, and I now feel ready to describe what happened. Almost Alone In early January, I found myself at a table with someone who did not speak. Everyone else was sitting at other tables, and I felt like it would be rude of me to move. It was an awkward situation, and I felt very alon...
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Back to School Stress

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Worrying about the risks of COVID-19 vs my children’s education Image created by the author. Next week, my children will return to school, as the UK begins the process of easing out of national lockdown. I am sure this will be good for their education, but I can’t help but feel a little bit uneasy about the risks. I am 52 years old, autistic and also a widowed parent. One of my children has type 1 diabetes, and I am effectively his carer. If I were to catch COVID-19, there is nobody else here to take care of my children. And there is no ex-partner who could help. However, my doctor says that I will not be given higher priority for the vaccine. So I will just have to hope that my children do not bring it home with them. After isolating for so long, I am now effectively being forced to take risks. I know a few people who are younger (who live with partners), who have already had the vaccine, because they have children who are autistic. (I believe one of my children may be autistic, but h...
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Attending an Informal Meet-Up Group for Autistic Adults — My First Weeks

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It took a lot of courage, but it was an interesting experience Many months ago, I found myself wondering what it might be like to meet up with a group of autistic people. I wondered how successful it could be, given that the members would be people who tend to find social situations difficult. And would it be enough, to have nothing but autism in common? Back then, searching online revealed one or two groups within my area, but they all seemed to meet up in the evenings. As a widowed parent with very little support, that meant I couldn’t easily go, because my children were too young to be left alone. So given that I had some doubts, it didn’t seem worth the effort of trying to arrange childcare. Recently, I started realising that my situation has changed, because my children are old enough to be left alone for an hour or two. So I found a group that meets up every week in a small cafe, and went to see what it was all about. (It’s been a while since I’ve put myself outside of my com...
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